7 Questions with Nick Guerra


by Ryan Meehan

With just under a decade into stand up, Nick Guerra has won over crowds from all walks of life. Whether it is performing from clubs to colleges to any place with a stage, Nick has shown that dedication and continuous work has paid off. His style balances all topics. Current events, relationship humor, and personal stories have become his arsenal when given a microphone. Many times the crowds never knew what to expect with Nick but were rarely disappointed. Nick was a writer, asst. director, actor and story producer for the Mun 2 reality show “Pitbull’s La Esquina” (2nd season), performed on Comedy Central’s “Gabriel Iglesias Stand Up Revolution” (2nd season) and Nuvo TV’s “Stand Up & Deliver” (2nd season). He was most recently seen as a semifinalist on NBC’s Last Comic Standing, and he’s our guest today in 7 questions. Continue reading

7 Questions with Nick Griffin

by Ryan Meehan
Comedian Nick Griffin has appeared on The Late Show with David Letterman nine times. He has also been seen on Conan, The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson as well as Comedy Central. Originally from Kansas City, Nick now lives in New York City, where he performs regularly at the Comedy Cellar. We are happy to have him as our guest today in 7 questions.

RM: What was the comedy scene like in Kansas City when you were first coming up and who were some of the performers there that you really found to be entertaining? How did your first paid gig go; and did you really feel like the pressure was truly on for the first time because you were being compensated for your comedy?

NG: There were a lot of smart comics in KC when I started. Most of us were very average, but we knew what we needed to do to get better. The first gig I did was in a dance bar. It was horrible. No one was listening and I had two decent jokes. At the end of the night the headliner thought we should pool our money and buy some coke. The other comic and I declined.

RM: On the testimonials section of your website there is a video of Colin Quinn talking about you where he mentions that you’re “a nice guy, but not a friendly guy”…What do you think he means by that; and do you agree with that assessment of your persona? Do you think that a comic nowadays has to exhibit a calculated sense of cynicism in order to survive, especially in a city like New York? And is it possible to be “too likeable” in this industry?

NG: I think he meant I don’t mingle a lot, but that’s changed. We know each other better now. I don’t think a comic needs to be cynical but it does seem to happen to a lot of comedians. But I’m sure the same thing is true for business people and insurance salespeople and dancers and lawyers. You get older, you get crustier. I think the goal to be a good comic is to just be yourself, whatever that means to you. But what do I know?

RM: You mention in your act that half of the people in this country should be wearing a helmet…Would you estimate that over time that percentage is probably going to increase and might already be higher than that? What do you think is the root of most of the stupidity found in America today?

NG: Do I say that? The truth is most people are doing the best they can, including me. Another truth is we could do a lot better. I mean once every three years I shit my pants. I’d like to lower that percentage.

RM: What moves you to write horror scripts? When did you first find yourself enamored with authoring these pieces; and what is the subject of the screenplay you are currently working on?

NG: I’ve always been a big horror fan. I grew up watching that stuff. SO now it is in my DNA. Early in my career I realized I had a lot of free time during the day, so I taught myself screenwriting. I’ve written other stuff, but always come back to horror. Just basic people lost in the woods, get attacked by monster stuff.

RM: Back in 2012, you released a set’s worth of material on a CD called “Shot in the Face” that was actually recorded in 2004…Why didn’t you release that disc shortly after it was recorded in the first place? Did you have any comedians suggest to you that it may not have been in your best interests to finally put the album out? What made you finally decide to release it?

NG: I recorded and sold it from 2004 to 2010. But only after shows,.. It was unavailable online. SO I re-released it.

RM: You had a great tweet the other day in light of a major comedy news event where you said “Letterman crashed the cool kids’ party for a living. What a legacy!!” Do you think it’s going to be extremely hard for a guy like Stephen Colbert to fill his shoes, especially since Letterman was always being himself and Colbert has basically been playing a character for the past nine years? When you have total control of a room and you’re killing it, does it ever feel to you like you are crashing the cool kids’ party?

NG: I think Colbert will do great. He’s too talented for it to turn out otherwise. As for me, when I am doing well, it just feels easy, feels like I’m relaxed and in charge. The other 23 hours a day feel hard.

RM: Have you ever at any point toyed with the idea of working with other writers to compose material for your stand-up act? What’s your take on group brainstorming sessions that exist for the sole purpose of assisting one comedian in delivering his ideas for jokes?

NG: I think helping out a comic by brainstorming works for some people. But I have my process now after 25 plus years. So I work alone.

RM: What’s up next for you in the remainder of 2014? Anything big in the works that we should know about?

NG: I’m hoping to shoot an hour long special in October. Fingers crossed. And I’ll be writing my ass off too.

Official Website: http://nickgriffin.net/

Nick on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/thenickgriffin

Nick on Twitter: https://twitter.com/thenickgriffin

Once again thanks for visiting First Order Historians and enjoying more of the internet’s finest in user generated content.


7 Questions with David Waite


by Ryan Meehan

A darkly-funny everyman whose shows are nonstop fun, Dave Waite has captured the hearts of comedy fans everywhere. Dave’s swagger, his honesty, and his endless supply of bizarre catchphrases have earned him a reputation as a comic’s comic with broad crossover appeal. There’s no such thing as a “typical Dave Waite show,” as his willingness to be in the moment takes his performances to places that some comedians wouldn’t dare visit. Dave’s recent CD “Kaboom!” was recorded at Skyline Comedy Café in Appleton, WI by Grammy-winning label Stand Up! Records. Tracks from “Kaboom!“ can be heard regularly on Sirius and XM Satellite Radio, as well as Pandora. Dave appeared as a guest on The Bob & Tom Show, one of the most popular morning shows in America, and performed on the fourth season of Comedy Central’s “Live at Gotham.” He currently lives in New York City but regularly tours comedy clubs and universities around the country, and he’s our guest today in 7 questions. Continue reading

Nick Saban is Worth Every Penny of the Money that The University of Texas Supposedly Offered Him, and it’s Time to Bury the Whole “Athletes and Coaches Make Too Much Money” Argument‏


by Ryan Meehan

Hardly your resident college football expert here at FOH, I’m stepping a bit outside my comfort zone to deliver today’s piece. However, I am familiar with the finances of sport – both at the professional and college level.

This past week, various sources reported that in a new book written by Paul Finebaum of the SEC Network “My Conference Can Beat Your Conference,” Finebaum stated the following:

“Texas was dead serious about trying to money-whip Saban. Depending on who you talk to — Bama big hitters or Texas big hitters — the Longhorns were prepared to give Saban somewhere between a $12 million and $15 million signing bonus and a salary package worth $100 million [plus performance bonuses].”

Saban has stated that there was never an intention to go to Texas, and that he is happy at Alabama where he is currently developing this year’s team to be everything that the fans expect in that state. Although he’s a great coach, as we know from previous experiences what he says in the press conferences isn’t exactly what goes on behind the scenes. So long story short here: He was probably offered the money, but eventually decided to stay in Tuscaloosa.

That’s all good and well, but it’s not really what bothered me about the story itself. The aftermath of the reports quickly spread to talk radio, and my biggest sports pet peeve once again rattled my eardrums until I got home.


Explaining that pet peeve is quite easy: I’m exhausted with hearing about how those involved with athletics make too much money. It’s a very simple supply and demand system, and anybody that hasn’t been beaten with a brick recently can tell you that. The reason that teachers and firefighters don’t make as much money as wide receivers is because they can’t sell jerseys and don’t bring in millions of dollars in ticket sales and television revenue. The argument should stop there, but for some reason people continue to cry and cry about this “injustice” in society that for some reason should be the fault of guys like Vernon Davis and Jimmy Graham.

And it’s got to stop. Seriously. You hear it all too much, and for some reason all of these people bitching about how wrong this supposed societal ill is are ignoring a simple concept called inflation. (Although obviously not the sole reason for the spike in salaries, I can clearly remember paying 98 cents for a gallon of gas seventeen years ago) I am so sick of these whiny pricks. If every firefighter and teacher made a hundred million dollars, Sales Tax on a candy bar would be 755%. Trust me, it wouldn’t work.

Returning to Saban, one of the sports talk radio personalities on the air questioned whether or not coaches should be making this sort of money. I say they absolutely should. Not all of them, but this is Nick Saban we’re talking about here – If anybody deserves that money it should be him. Plus, the athletes themselves aren’t getting paid yet (at least not legally) so you could definitely understand that there has to be a lot of money available to a guy like Saban. He won three national championships in a four year stretch, and I’d even be willing to suggest that if he continues at his current pace, we have to honestly start considering him to be one of the best college football coaches ever. The only other coach to win a national championship at two different schools? Bear Bryant. That’s not exactly Dave Wannstedt-level company.


Not that you want to be on that level…

Saban has gone 72-9 in his last six years as head coach of Alabama. There was even a perfect 14-0 season in there, and the amount of respect he commands from his players on a daily basis is a power not many other coaches have at any level in any sport. When you think about it, this demand for hard work, dedication, and good behavior off the field is something that should have a hefty price tag attached to it, especially when you consider that you’re managing a bunch of college athletes on scholarships.

Which brings me back to the teachers and firefighters thing…Saban essentially is both of those positions as a college coach. Putting out “fires” and instructing college students is pretty much his entire day. So if some of these NFL players are making this real scratch, I see no reason Saban shouldn’t be bringing home an equal amount of bacon as well. If Joe Flacco got a $120 million contract with the Baltimore Ravens, I’m certain that all of the boosters that support the University of Texas’ athletic department can come up with something in the hundred million dollar range with pretty limited effort.

So now that we have several players making nine-digit money over a period of time, I think it’s more than high time that we start offering coaches the same amount of cash. It’s safe to say that they possess a much lower risk of injury (unless they are running onto the field a la Mike Tomlin) and more importantly, they make decisions that have a serious effect on the future of the franchises they are directing. Although the coaches will never play a down, it’s their mindgame we’re watching. And at the college level, it takes a whole hell of a lot more direction and the pressure of being at some of these programs (especially in the SEC) is so large that as writers, we can’t even fathom it or come up with a scale showing how it should be measured.

So while you may hear from some people that may or may not be sports fans that athletes and those involved with athletics make too much money, you aren’t going to hear that take from me. Capitalism is a pretty simple thing to understand, and just because you view someone’s job as being less valuable than yours doesn’t mean it is. And keep in mind, unless we’re talking about the Green Bay Packers these pro teams are private institutions. They have people in charge (just like any other business) who have invested millions of dollars of their own money into making this business become great. In other words, it’s their money and they can do whatever the hell they want with it. Colleges also should operated as businesses, and I shouldn’t need to explain to you that Texas’ football program brings in a whole lot more money than their fucking microbiology department does.

"With the first pick in the NFL draft, no team will ever take this guy..."

“With the first pick in the NFL draft, no team will ever take this guy…”

I can’t wait to see the day when we meet the first hundred million dollar coach. Saban’s contract is up January 21st, 2022…So we may already be familiar with him already.

Once again thanks for visiting First Order Historians and enjoying more of the internet’s finest in user generated content.


7 Questions with Sam Totman of DragonForce


by Ryan Meehan

It’s astonishing to realize that DragonForce now have a history going back 15 years, and that they’re about to release their sixth album. But such is the pace at which music and life move these days that what was seemingly a highly promising young British metal band just yesterday are now an established full force (ahem) on the scene. In fact, their reputation is such that anything new from this lot is regarded as a landmark moment in the ongoing story of metal. But the new DragonForce album is a revelation, one that will surely entice them to another level of achievement.  It’s called “Maximum Overload,” and that’s precisely what you get from the 10 tracks on the main album, plus the five bonus songs for the special edition and a DVD. “We have our own style and sound,” says Herman Li, who founded the band in 1999 with fellow guitarist Sam Totman. “And we didn’t want to move away from that. Once you’ve got your trademark approach in place, that’s what fans come to expect from you. But we also wanted to challenge ourselves. We didn’t want to rehash what we’d done before, but take it all in a fresh direction.“  With “Maximum Overload,” DragonForce haven’t so much reinvented themselves as reimagined their aspirations. The result is an album full of command, energy and vitality. It’s got strength in depth and breadth. Sophistication allied to an attention to detail that goes beyond what’s been done before.  We are grateful to have guitarist Sam Totman of DragonForce as our guest today in 7 questions. Continue reading